Daddy's Little Girl (Not)

Dear Lila,

Man, you are still being so cold toward Daddy. Last week, he was away for three days for a business trip and when he came back, he knelt down and held his arms out toward you for a hug. You ran toward him . . . and then right around him to get to me. The other night, he was going to read to you while I took a shower. When I came out of the shower, you weren't reading with Daddy in your room but sitting outside of the bathroom door. Daddy said that you had refused to read with him and had been sitting outside the bathroom waiting for me, like a little puppy, the whole time I'd been in there.

One night, Daddy and I were hugging. You did not like this because you ran over to us, grabbed me and said, "No, mine!" And then last night, you and I were cuddling in bed. When Daddy climbed into bed next to us, you tried to push him away and told him angrily, "Go!" When I got out of bed to get some water, you started crying and reaching for me, as if I was leaving you with a stranger forever and not your father. Seriously, you're breaking his heart!

Love,
Mom

The Kindness of Strangers

Dear Lila,

I grew up in Pittsburgh, a friendly city where neighbors say hi to each other on the street and store clerks go out of their way to help you find what you're looking for. Then I moved to New York City, where neighbors don't even know each other's names and store clerks will stand less than a foot away from you staring off into space while you struggle to hold the door open and push your Cadillac of a stroller through (and when you dare to ask them for help, they glare at you for interrupting their daydream about Chris Pine). I am from a friendly city, so I am inherently friendly. Daddy grew up in New York and while he is not rude, he is definitely not as affable as I am. Like Daddy, you and your brother are native New Yorkers but I hope you inherit more of my open friendliness because, while cliche, a little does go a long way.

We have been having a brutal winter characterized by bitter cold temperatures, endless snow and dangerous hailstorms. The sidewalks are covered in sheets of ice and many of the crosswalks are not shoveled, so pushing you in the stroller to pick GuhGaw up from school has been a big challenge. So today, I decided that we would take the bus to get Connor but that was an ordeal in and of itself. The bus stop is only two blocks away from our house but helping you maneuver the slippery sidewalks and slushy snowbanks--while making sure I didn't fall, either--took awhile and we missed two buses on our way to the stop. Once we reached the stop, we had to wait more than 10 minutes in the freezing cold for the next bus and when it arrived, it was so packed that we could barely get in. That's when the kindness of strangers made such a difference.

Once we got on the bus, a woman helped me hold you while I put my Metrocard in the machine so that you wouldn't fall down while the bus was moving. Then, another woman sitting in the first seat near the door stood up so that I could sit down and put you in my lap. I'd never taken the bus to Connor's school before and the bus driver helped me find the closest stop. After we picked up GuhGaw, we were waiting for a bus to go back home and the first bus that came said, "Next Bus Please" but it stopped for us anyway. After we got on, I noticed that it was the same driver who had taken you and me to the school. He didn't stop at the other bus stops, even though people were waiting at them, until he got to the stop we needed; he actually wasn't supposed to have stopped to pick us up near the school, but I think he wanted to help out the mom waiting in the freezing cold with two little kids. I was seriously touched by his--and everyone's--kindness, which turned what could have been an awful task into a much more manageable one. It makes me feel so good to see such caring people like that and I hope that you and Connor will always do whatever you can to make other people feel the same goodness.

Love,
Mom

Sweet Sister

Dear Lila,

While I was cooking dinner tonight, I noticed that you had lined up all of your Disney princess books on the floor. Then, I watched as you took your Disney princess figurines and placed each one on top of her corresponding book. How cute--and organized!

Later in the evening, GuhGaw (who didn't take a nap today) was so tired that he fell asleep on his bedroom floor with his nap mat under his head like a pillow. When you saw him like this, you pulled the nap mat out from under his head, unrolled it, pointed to it and said, "Here, Guhgaw, here," telling your brother to sleep on top of the mat. He was passed out and obviously didn't hear you, but it was still such a sweet gesture :)

Love,
Mom

25-Month Update

Dear Lila,

It's only been a month since you turned 2 but I feel as if you've really blossomed over the past four weeks. For one, you have learned more new words than I can keep track of and have started saying two-word phrases, such as "you here" (you motion to a spot next to you and say this when you want me to sit with you) and "Guhgaw, up" (Connor was laying on the couch and you wanted him to get up and play with you). You also say "cue me" (excuse me), which is so cute (and polite!). 

Your love of reading has continued to grow. You often come up to me with a book, ask me to "ree" (read) and then happily plop into my lap. But you're also content sitting by yourself and flipping through books on your own. You can identify dozens of objects in your books now and if there's a man, woman, boy or girl pictured, you point to them and say "Daddy," "Mama," "GuhGaw" and "me," respectively. You are slowly learning your colors, letters and numbers but right now, whenever I ask you what color something is, you always say it's blue. And all the letters are p and all of the numbers are 2.

You really enjoy your soccer class (when I ask you what you did in class, you say, "Kick ball."), have become so good at completing puzzles, sing and dance even more now and love playing with your baby dolls (it's so cute the way you "feed" them and put them in your lap and read to them). You are so eager to try new foods--most toddlers are so wary of unfamiliar foods but whether it's pickles, tomato juice or something else you've never seen before, you ask for some. You don't always like these new foods (you were not a fan of beets) but at least you always want to try them first. You currently love oranges and cheer "Chang chang!" (Chinese for orange) when you see me peeling one. You also like sour stuff and even enjoy sucking on fresh lemon and lime wedges!

Potty training you has been going slowly but you did well with it this past weekend. You asked to go pee twice on Friday night and then at 5:30am, you woke up, called out for me and asked to go pee. I wasn't happy about being woken up at 5:30 in the morning but I was proud of you for asking to go to the bathroom! 

You are generally incredibly agreeable, responding with a well-behaved "okay" when I ask you to do something, but your stubbornness is becoming more of an issue. You occasionally throw fits when I have to change your diaper or want you to wash your hands and you hate, hate, hate wearing mittens and gloves, so trying to put them on for you before you go outside is a battle I usually lose--you actually clasp your hands together tightly so that I can't possibly put them on. You also don't like wearing hats or your puffy winter jacket but I definitely won't let you go out without those, so I'll wrestle them onto you. It can be so hard to get you to wear them and then if that wasn't frustrating enough, sometimes you cry and refuse to take them off once we're back home. 

And on top of that, there were a few times when I couldn't even get you back in the house. Last week, we came home after your Moms & Tots class but you wanted to stay outside. You refused to come up the steps with me and I couldn't pick you up, so I actually had our neighbor pick you up and bring you into the house! Luckily, she just so happened to be leaving her house to run an errand; otherwise, I have no idea how I could have dragged you out of the cold! The terrible twos, ugh.

Overall, though, you are good more often than not and I love how happy, giggly, playful and active you are now (though you still remain stone-faced and silent when we go out--other than your family and your nanny, probably just a dozen people have ever seen you smile or talk!). I also love what a big sweetheart you are becoming. GuhGaw often gives me hugs and kisses and asks me to keep them in my heart so now you do the same by hugging and kissing me and then patting my chest and saying "har" (heart). Awww :)

Love,

Mom

Mess Maker

Dear Lila,

Your new favorite game is dumping all of your toys on the floor and rolling around in them. I guess it's kind of the equivalent to some adults' fantasy of throwing piles of cash on the floor and rolling around in them!

Love,
Mom

Who Needs A Bed?

Dear Lila,

You have a nice bed. It's big and comfy but I guess it's not big or comfy enough because every night, you insist on sleeping on the floor. You have a foam mat next to your bed but no, you don't even like to sleep on that. You prefer to sleep on the hardwood floor right next to your safety gate. Our nightly bedtime routine goes like this:

-I read a few books to you and GuhGaw

-We give GuhGaw goodnight and hugs and kisses and he goes to his room and gets into bed

-I put on your sleep sack, turn off your light, help you into bed, talk and sing to you for a little bit, say good night and get up to leave your room

-You sit up in bed and say "No! You here" to ask me to stay with you

-When I don't, you say, "Floor," get out of bed, waddle over to your gate and lay down on the floor

-I close your gate, say good night to you again and go downstairs

If I lead you back to bed while you're still awake, you just get up and lay down on the floor again as soon as I leave the room, so now I just wait until you fall asleep and have Daddy carry you to bed when he gets home from work. You've been doing this ever since we switched you to a toddler bed three months ago. For awhile, I laid out a nap mat next to the gate so that you at least fell asleep on the mat but after a couple weeks, you started pushing the mat out of the way and laying on the plain hardwood floor. *scratches my head in befuddlement* Oh well. I guess it's good for your back?

You like to sleep on the floor during nap time, too!

Love,

Mom

Princess Massacre

Dear Lila,

While I was cooking dinner tonight, you were sitting on the floor and playing with your Disney princess figurines. You lined them all up, grabbed a toy car . . . and then plowed them all down. You even went, "Aaaaaagh!" to mimic screaming. Um, should I be worried? :-P

Love,
Mom