A Mug for Mom

Dear Lila,

I was putting laundry away in your room this morning when I noticed a drawing you made on top of your dresser. It was of a coffee mug and the front of the mug said, "I'm the best mom. (My kids say so.)" It was so sweet and made me smile. I am so so grateful for you. Thank you for loving me the way you do!

Love,

Mom

Adult Matters

Dear Lila,

As planned, we went to Dyker Heights tonight to see the over-the-top Christmas lights that the neighborhood is famous for. It was a fun night, plus it was relatively warm out and not crowded, so double score! The funniest highlight of the evening happened on the way home, though, when we were driving through Bensonhurst:

You, looking out the window: Mama! There's an adult toy store! We can go there and get toys for you!

Me: Ohhhhh, uh-huh.

You: We can fill up your whole room with adult toys!**

Daddy: [quietly chuckles in the driver's seat]

**You will understand why this was funny when you're older!

Love,

Mom

You're Nine Years Old!

Dear Lila,

Sometimes, our hot water tank doesn't work properly and there is no hot water when we turn on the shower. When this happens, whoever is trying to take a shower will call out to Daddy that there's no hot water and he will go to the basement and restart the heater. The other day, you had no hot water for your shower but you knew MuiMui was napping and didn't want to wake her, so you took a cold shower. In the middle of December. Because you are that thoughtful and selfless!

I am in continual awe of your kindness. And your loyalty. And your dedication. And your sense of responsibility. And your maturity. This list goes on and on! You are an amazing daughter, a wonderful sister and as of today, an awesome 9-year-old! Happy birthday, Lilabear!

I always try to make your birthdays as special as possible but finding something fun to do at the freezing cold end-of-December proves to be a yearly challenge. And finding something fun--and safe--to do during a raging global pandemic is an even bigger challenge. This year, we are going to take you to see the crazy Christmas lights displays in Dyker Heights (something cool we've never done, check; something we can do as a family, check; something that is outdoors where we can socially distance, check!) tomorrow night (it was supposed to rain today--but then it didn't) but you are such an easygoing kid and such a loving daughter that you said that you would be happy to just spend time with me at home!

I am so lucky to have you and wish I had more free time to just hang out with you. When I do have that rare afternoon when there's no laundry to do and I don't have to start cooking dinner, I love how excited you get to do something with me, whether it is playing with your Barbie dolls, playing a board game (Life is your favorite), baking a treat (you like to pour the ingredients in the bowl and mix them together) or reading on the couch while cuddled under a blanket. We also go out on occasional mother-daughter walks, which usually end in us getting tacos or bubble tea.

You are such a joy. You still devour books and get so excited about reading new ones. You still love to eat and it's always fun introducing you to new foods and cuisines you've never tried before. You love to sing and dance and we have regular dance parties to our newest obsession, BTS (their music is so good!). You are an amazing sister and take such good care of your siblings that Daddy and I call you "Second Mama" because you are always looking out for them, making sure they have what they need and also putting them into place if they are misbehaving. You love to create art and always make cute drawings for me. You constantly do things to make others happy. You always finish your homework without me having to nag you about it. You make your bed every morning and keep your room clean (which is hard because DiDi and MuiMui are constantly in there making messes with your toys). You help wash the dishes every night. You are understanding when things don't go your way. You make sure we never forget to do our goodnight routine. You are so affectionate and constantly give me hugs and kisses every day. 

I love everything about you and grow prouder of you every day. I love you so much, Lilabear! Happy birthday!

Love,

Mom

Psychic Power

Dear Lila,

I was joking around and said I could tell the future. You said, "No you can't! You're not figh-sick!" Hahaha! That's how you pronounced psychic!

Love,

Mom

Morning Walk

Dear Lila,

Daddy had to leave for a business trip yesterday, which meant that I had to take you and DiDi to school today. I don't drive and your school is 1.7 miles away from our house. It was 40 degrees this morning and we totally could have taken an Uber but I asked you and your brother to try walking to school and you guys were awesome! Not only did you not complain (even though your backpack was heavy with your books, lunchbox and a water bottle) but we made it to school 13 minutes before the doors opened, so you even had time to play on the playground for a little bit. I was worried that you might be too cold during the long walk (it took us exactly 37 minutes) but you actually complained about being hot and wanted to take off your hat and gloves. Thank you for being such a good sport!

Love,

Mom

Biking Buddies

Dear Lila,

I am so proud of your dedication and determination. You always work so hard at everything, even if it's really challenging. Yesterday, the two of us went biking together on the Forest Park bike trail. I have ridden it several times but yesterday was the first time I took you with me. There are a lot of steep hills on the trail and you are still relatively new to riding a two-wheeler, plus you have only ridden on flat sidewalks and school playgrounds. I expected that we would have to slow down a lot on the trail while you dismounted your bike and walked it up the big hills but you surprised me--we only had to stop once at the very end where there is a steep hill that even I have to push really hard to get up. Every time we got to a steep section, I looked back at you and you were pushing through it with such focus and determination. And every time we got to the top of the hill, you had such a proud smile on your face. I hope you could see my proud smile, too--you did such an amazing job on the trail and I am so excited that riding on it together is something we can do more of now!

Love,

Mom

Mature Matters

Dear Lila,

You are only 8 years old, which is crazy, because you are already so mature. For one, you are incredibly responsible for an 8-year-old. You always complete your homework and your chores without anyone ever having to remind you to complete them. You know the rules and routines and always follow them. You have spent hours watching MuiMui for me without ever complaining or taking your eyes off of her. When your brothers are doing something they are not supposed to, you call them on it or tell me if they don't stop. 

Second, your emotional intelligence is higher than many adults I have encountered. You are so perceptive of people's feelings and you always try to make others feel better. I happened to run into your pre-k teacher last week and she told me that whenever a kid in your class was crying about something, other kids would ignore or avoid the upset child but you always went over and tried to give the kid a toy or pat him/her on the arm. And you were just 3 years old back then! And you are just as thoughtful and considerate now, always asking if I'm okay or need help with anything. If I have had a rough day, you hug me and say you hope tomorrow will be better.

You have always acted so grown-up for your age and now you are doing so many grown-up things. You help wash the dishes every day. You pour milk for your brothers. You bring the dinner plates to the table. You pick up MuiMui and carry her around. You asked if you could spend your own money, so I gave you $30 from your piggy bank, took you to Target and let you buy whatever you wanted. You painstakingly looked through the book and toy sections before settling on two graphic novels for you and a board book for MuiMui's upcoming birthday. Later that day, we went to a coffee shop where you felt even more like an adult when you went up to the counter to order and pay for our drinks by yourself (you ordered a babyccino, a cappuccino sans coffee--how cute!). And today, I took you to a salon where you got your first "big girl" haircut--this was your first haircut in a salon that didn't have chairs shaped like airplanes and shelves full of toys for sale!

And now you're also asking to get your ear pierced! What happened to my baby Lilabear?!

Love,

Mom